Kill Me Now!!!!!

So he did end up calling me....and like the weak person I am....I picked up. I know what you are thinking "What the hell is wrong with you?" Trust me I am asking myself that question almost everyday....still no answer...Ahhhhhhhhhhh! Anyway this happened awhile back ago and I don't remember every word he said. I do however recall him telling me that he did not want to lose me form his life, I told him if he really cared sooo freaking much he would have never done what he did to me, because he knew how I felt about it. He had nothing to really say to that. Like I said to him..hes the one who really made the decision in the end...not me. Any way he said that if it would "Heal and Nurture me" he would not ever speak to me or see me again if that's what I wanted. Of course that's not what he wants, but he wants to respect my wishes. Cool make me look like an asshole for telling you to bug off. It makes me soooo mad! I asked him "What did he want from me?" he said "My friendship" and he also wants to try and fix me sense HE broke me...I mean what kind of F'd up shit is that! I told him I don't NEED him to role up and fix MY LIFE...I can do that on my own....Thank you very much.

But I have made a plan and I know some of you may want to kill me for doing this, but I have deiced to see him one last time before the new year is here. I really don't want my last memory of him to be in a hospital with scrubs on....that just seems to painful. I am going to see him and tell him face to face how thankful I am for the fact that he cheated on me (again). Ya I know why would I be thankful for such a thing...well because it got him out of my life for good, and he wont bring crap in to my future. He will be in the past with 2011 and I will go on with my life in 2012 without him in it. It feels amazing just to think about. I am looking forward to a kick ass new year! I mean I will be traveling and having the time of my life! I am so excited for it all!

Oh work has been GREAT (Not at all). People are getting sick left and right no one was happy and It just kind of sucked. I also had to work on Christmas, I was kind of sad about that...but hey more money for me. I just hope I can get some people to cover for me this week. I just need some time for me. But I had a wonderful day. There is nothing that means more to me than family and friends. They are my world and life and I love them all sooooo much!

I hope everyone had a Happy Christmas and a Happy Hanukkah as well as a Happy Kwanzaa!